Life After College as a Campus Minister
Interview with Shelby Ponikiewski
Part Four from our “Thy Will Be Done: Life After College” Series
Photo by Chelsey Shortman
Introduction
They say there is no more of an “in-between” time than the state of life one finds themselves in when transitioning out of college and into the “real” world. What am I going to do with my degree? Will I even going to use it at all? What will my life consist of now? With so much uncertainty surrounding us, we just want to know where the heck and dare I say to whom God might be calling us to in this new stage of life.
In an era dedicated to the empowerment of women and their femininity, it is easy to fall under the pressure of needing to fit some vague and ambiguous mold that conveys “I’m successful.” However, here at The Catholic Woman, we understand that every woman’s greatness and true success lies within her own personal fiat to the unique vocation God invites her to and wills for her life.
We interviewed five women about discovering their unique calling to life after college and asked them about the steps they took to figure them out. We hope that in learning about their journeys, you will be daring enough to start your own — beginning with allowing the Lord to turn the page into a new chapter.
Interview with Shelby
Shelby grew up in the quaint, picturesque, little town of Shady Shores, Texas. After a very positive high school youth ministry experience, she received her BA in Pastoral Ministry from the University of Dallas and has served in youth and young adult ministry for the past four and a half years. She now lives with her husband in Irving, TX and (when she’s not working in Campus Ministry) enjoys reading, watching Fixer Upper, and listening to Dave Ramsey.
Tell us about yourself and what you do!
My name is Shelby Ponikiewski, and I'm a campus minister at my Alma Mater, where I graduated in 2015 with a bachelor's in Pastoral Ministry.
How did you “prepare” for life after graduation?
I had an experience, unlike my peers. I was told to apply for a position in October of my senior year, I interviewed in November, was offered the job in December, and I didn't start until May, three days after I graduated.
How did this transition affect your relationship with God?
This was really a blessing because it taught me to rely on him for my plans and not worry about if it's going to be what I want. Having a job already lined up my last semester of college, in my dream field, using my degree, was really an amazing feeling.
How have things turned out differently than anticipated in your career? How are you finding contentment with your life?
The position I was in turned out to be a very difficult one for me. I was the full-time Director of Youth and Young Adult Ministry at a parish that had been operating sans youth minister for 9 months (an entire school year). I ended up leaving after two years for a job as a coordinator of high school evangelization and catechesis. It wasn't what I anticipated, but again God had me right where I needed to be at the time!
How has finding a community and a new sense of home in the Church been like?
After graduating, it was pretty challenging. There was no young adult ministry, and basically the only young adults were my volunteers (there were like 3 married ones with kids, one older lady in her 60s, and two single guys so it was particularly hard to make new girlfriends). I had built a pretty uplifting community with my middle school volunteers by the end of my 2 years, but it was two seminarians, one married woman and one married guy both with adult children. The only community I really had was my roommate, who also graduated from UD and also was in youth ministry, and another youth minister I became very close with when we both started as youth ministers after graduating. When I moved to Arizona for my second job post-grad, I moved to an amazing community with lots of really inspiring young adults and an amazing pastor and parish staff who were all super welcoming, so that was really easy to feel a part of the community.
How are you intentionally living out your faith and seeking out new friendships?
I try to read the scriptures daily, attend daily Mass when I can, spend time before the Blessed Sacrament weekly, and go to confession once a month. As an introvert, I wouldn't say I'm very good at seeking new friendships, but I have a routine of the current people in my life who I invest time with, and am always open to new friendships if they're in front of me.
Drawing from your own experience, what advice might you give to women who are currently in the midst of their transition from graduation to post-grad life? How might they discern the next steps the Lord might be inviting them to take?
I would tell them not to worry. Remember God has blessed you and guided you this far and he's not going to stop. Trust in him. Have a habit of prayer and you will know when it's time to leave or stay. If something isn't right in the position you find yourself in, you do not have to stay. That means in a dating relationship or in a job or in a living situation. And never take the next step without trying to see why God brought you to the current step. While my first position was really challenging, and in some ways a toxic work environment, I don't know how I would have met my husband if I didn't work there when I did. And even though I was only in Arizona for a year, it was the most necessary, healing and fruitful thing for my ministry. And I feel it all prepared me for where I am now, ministering to young women who are exactly where I was just four and a half short years ago. And I couldn't have planned it this way, so I'm glad I didn't worry about it and just followed the gentle breeze of clarifying grace that is the Holy Spirit. Pray, hope, and don't worry!