Letter from Nyssa Biszko

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To my sisters,

Carry a light, and bring along the oil, for you know not how long you will wait for Him.

A mother, a wife, and a woman who has stood trembling at death’s door, I am writing this letter so as to bring you comfort. There are many things that I could share about my own life, each with a corresponding example of how our Lord’s hand has been at work in my soul.

I was not always afraid of Mary’s “fiat”- of her generous “yes” to the Lord. I wasn’t afraid of it at the age of eleven, when I felt called to the cloistered life, or when, at eighteen, I realized that the religious life was not God’s plan for me. The hand of fear had no hold when I stood at the altar to exchange Wedding Vows with my husband. But at some point, it crept in. Perhaps it came when we almost lost our first daughter at birth. Perhaps it grew as time went on, and we became pregnant again. Yes, I know it had crept in by then. But, I swept it under the rug and decided to avoid facing what I was truly afraid of.

And then, our second daughter came into the world. Merely hours old, she was whisked away when I began to hemorrhage. There it was: the fear that I had denied. I clung to life, thinking, “This couldn’t possibly be His plan. I have two girls whom I want to raise in the faith.”

The days following brought about another hemorrhage, and more fear; for myself and for my girls. In those long hours, I sung with my voice shaking; hymns and chants, trying to see beyond the fear. With each word, I clung a little less, and trusted a little more.

There are days when Mary’s “fiat”- her resounding “yes,” seemingly will not be found in my heart. But we are earthbound only for as long as heaven deems fit, be it for tomorrow or for fifty years. He will call us, and our dying hours will be as vivid as the ones we are living now. We will leave life messy- with dirty laundry left at home, with prayer books left open, and with unsung songs on our lips. And that’s ok.

I suppose that my question to you is: will He find you and I ready? Will He find you and I willing to let Him finish the unfinished in our lives? Could He honestly ask you and I for what we treasure most, and find us compliant? I am grateful that He saw my lantern unlit, and gave me a chance- not once, but twice- to refill the oil.

In His generosity,

Nyssa

Get to know Nyssa Biszko

Wife, Mother & Small Business Owner

Please introduce yourself!

Dear sisters, it's rare that I have a moment to reflect on who I am these days. I'm a stay at home mother to two small girls, and the wife of an Air Force man. Nurturing a home life for my family wherever we are stationed in the world is one of my greatest joys. It came as a surprise to me, after years of longing for the cloistered Religious Life, but God loves to reveal His kindness in ways unknown to us!

What do the first two hours of your day look like?

In the waking hours of the morning, I'm often pulled from my bed much sooner than I'd like! In the bustle of getting my husband out the door, diapers changed, and breakfast made, I'm still struggling to wake up. When I do pull myself together quickly enough, I take the girls to Daily Mass in town. My oldest girl is three, and so I often bribe her into whispers with the promise of a bakery treat! Most of the time it works, and we make our way to the bakery after Mass. It solidifies my heart in this vocation when I see that faithfulness to God comes in these simple acts.

Describe your favorite part of your current occupation.

As a stay at home wife and mother, I wish I could say that my joy comes strictly from that vocation. It would seem that God, again, had other plans for my heart. He called me to be restless without art. As a Fine Art Major, I have slowly learned what that means for me, and for my family. I currently design and operate a brand that reaches out to mothers. It's main aim is to nurture them as they cultivate the next generation.

Tell us a little bit about your shop, Deck & Oar.

Deck & Oar is a mother to mother company, aiming to nurture support, sharing, and connection. It is comprised of a shop, blog, and social media network.

What led you to create this shop?

After the birth of my first daughter three years ago, I switched from art school and an equine barn management position to being a stay at home wife and mother. I struggled deeply with that change. It wasn't until now that I realized that what I was struggling with was actually a call to do more: a vocation within my vocation. It has taken me three years to develop what Deck & Oar should be, and I'm constantly reassessing to make sure this is what I'm supposed to be doing! It really was a call that I needed to answer for myself to find happiness. Especially on social media today, I see a deep need in our society to show the beauty of motherhood through art. Looking back, I thought that I was failing because motherhood alone wasn't enough for me; however, St. John Paul II wrote in his Letter to Artists that "humanity in every age, and even today, looks to works of art to shed light upon its path and its destiny." (John Paul II, Letter to Artists, 1999, Section 14, An Appeal to Artists) My calling wasn't simply to motherhood, but to extend whatever God-given talents I have to this calling. My discoveries and challenges weren't meant to be hidden, as I would often like, but shared in a way that shares a greater plan for what motherhood is: a call to holiness.

"My calling wasn't simply to motherhood, but to extend whatever God-given talents I have to this calling. My discoveries and challenges weren't meant to be hidden, as I would often like, but shared in a way that shares a greater plan for what motherhood is: a call to holiness."

Where does your inspiration come from for D&O?

My inspiration comes from many places, but mostly my two girls. They stretch me, mold me, and constantly make me aware of my reliance on God. It's this chiseled-to-become-a-diamond process that makes me constantly aware of what mothers face every day. I've struggled with physical health issues over the last few months that make it difficult for me to get out of the house for ministry. Deck & Oar has become an answer to my prayer, 'Lord, how can I minister?'

Ultimately, what do you hope to accomplish with D&O?

Through Deck & Oar, I hope to fulfill whatever it is our Lord has called me to. I desperately hope each day that someone will be given hope amidst the dirty diapers and the laundry piles. They may not see God through my posts, but He's there in the beauty. I hope they see His hand and one day see that it was His.

What's one fear that keeps you up at night?

All of my fears relate directly to my children. How will they grow up unharmed in today's society? What if something happens to them? But God gave His only son to us. These fears have made me understand the sacrifice and love of God the Father. He will never ask us for something that He Himself has not already given. I wrestle with this so much, but He is working on my heart.

"All of my fears relate directly to my children. How will they grow up unharmed in today's society? What if something happens to them? But God gave His only son to us. These fears have made me understand the sacrifice and love of God the Father."

Tell us about the first time you experienced a strong sense of belonging in the church.

When I was a teenager, I had the unique opportunity to attend World Youth Day. It was held in Germany that year. My dad who had lived in Germany as a teenager lept at the opportunity to take me! As we stood on the mile-long field where the main events were happening, I was in awe. Young Catholics from all over the world knelt in worship of our Eucharistic King. It was so clear that we all belonged there and had a piece of God's heart.

Tell us about a woman you look up to!

Sometimes I think we forget that the Blessed Virgin Mary lived here on earth. She was as real as you and I! I look to her constantly for assurance and hope.