In the summer of 2004, I was sitting on a park bench with a view of the city’s skyline across from me, and these words filled my heart: “If not you, who? If not now, when?” … I could see that God was at work as He quietly stirred my heart, asking me to ponder His words more deeply while I discerned for the next chapter in my life.
Read MoreIf someone told me 10 years earlier that I would eventually be married and a stay-at-home mom, I would have been angry. It was not the type of life I imagined myself having when I left the Church, and God, in pursuit of worldly things. I left the Church in pursuit of the lies our world tells us about sexuality, gender, and lack of commitment to others.
Read MoreA couple of years ago in college, I led a confirmation retreat. Even though I was dealing with a lot of anxiety about my relationship and vocation at that time, this retreat allowed me to leave all that for just a bit and focus on our 7th- and 8th-grade students. What a blessing that was!
Read MoreI realized that some of my coworkers had made it years if not a lifetime without any intimate encounter with Love Himself, with the assurance of being seen, known, and cared for no matter what.
Read MoreMost of my trip to Lourdes was spent asking the Lord to reveal where in my life I needed the most healing, and after sitting in the queue for over an hour, meditating on rosary after rosary, I was finally ushered inside to ask the Blessed Mother to heal my heart from a life of past abuse.
Read MoreDear Friends,
Even as a child my family could see that I was a nurturer; I could constantly be found taking care of a doll or stuffed animal in a gentle and intentional manner. The desire to provide them with a safe, loving, comfortable environment was certainly within me! I can vividly remember the day that I put on a full wedding ceremony for two of my teddy bears.
Read MoreWhen I was pregnant with my fourth child, God blessed me with an opportunity to go on a retreat where I first heard the message that we all have an individual call from God – a vocation – that is the path to our holiness. For some, it is a call to the single life, for others it is the call to marriage and motherhood – for all, it is a call to sanctify our lives and offer up our days as a prayer to our Heavenly Father.
Read MoreSo what is the truth of what it means to be a Catholic woman today? The truth is that our vocation is not found in one single decision in time. Our vocation is not proven through what we went to school for, our ability to hold a job, or where we live. Our vocation is not necessarily one thing. Our vocation can change with the seasons. Whether we are married, single, or a religious, God can call us all over the place, to a number of different careers or workplaces; we should not be convinced that one path is the only path.
Read MoreIt was a hot and muggy Wednesday evening as I sat alone in a church pew for adoration. Sweat was soaking the back of my shirt, tears were streaming down my face, and my only thought as I knelt before the golden monstrance and the Blessed Sacrament within was “What the heck am I doing here, God?”
Read MoreSisters, when we are lost, God asks us: “what happened to you and where are you?” Imagine what your life would look like if fear, anxiety, doubt or worry did not dictate any of your decisions. Imagine letting go of control, of your own carefully crafted plan for your life and trusting that God’s plan and timing are so much better than what we can conjure up for ourselves. Imagine surrendering everything. What would your life look like?
Read MoreUpon returning home, I did a lot of reflecting on this trip and why God called me there. And I realized that God doesn’t always give us the answers to our prayers in simple terms. At some times, I’m still confused as to what my calling might me. But through this experience, through God’s love, and through the sense of community I found in Honduras, I’ve learned that I am called to simply love my neighbors. Yes, I’m still unsure of what career I should pursue, but I’ve learned that if I love the people right in front of me and treat them with kindness, God will provide the rest.
Read MoreI still felt clueless about successfully coping with anxiety but I was steadily on the road to recovery. I was still depressed and still suicidal but, as I held my nephew, I realized the many successes of choosing life again and again that had brought me to this moment of meeting him. So I whispered a soft “Thank you” to him because deep down I knew I wanted to live for God and I’d been searching for a meaningful way of doing so.
Read MoreSome days after the conversation with Sr. Hope, though, sitting before Jesus in the Adoration chapel and still mulling over the job offer, I asked a different question: “Lord, what would bring You joy? How do You want me to serve?”
He didn’t answer by saying ,”You’ll bring me joy when you have a Ph.D.”; or, “You’ll delight me when you become a professor.” Instead, He whispered, ever so gently, “You bring me joy when you use the gifts I have given you, right here and now. You delight me already.”
Read MoreBut with every small victory—the occasional moments when I am able to practice gentleness with my 4-year-old, despite how mad I am that he just pushed his little brother down the steps—a change takes place in me. My capacity for gentleness grows. I had no idea how much virtue I lacked in the realms of gentleness, self-control, and patience. Motherhood moved my focus from an external sense of stability and social validation to a much deeper internal need for God’s grace and guidance—inevitably helping me rely more on God’s fatherhood.
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